In an emotional late-night conversation days before her death, Dame Deborah James’ mother stated that her daughter, who devoted her dying moments to campaigning, disclosed that she “did not want to die.”
Heather James, speaking for the first time about the devastating loss of her kid in June, also said that the Bowel Babe activist had “no regrets” when they talked a week before her death after a five-year battle with bowel cancer. In the last four weeks of her life, the 40-year-old raised an astounding £7 million for cancer research, was appointed a dame by Prince William for her ‘tireless’ labour, and went on excursions such as a trip to Royal Ascot.
In the last four weeks of her life, the 40-year-old raised an astounding £7 million for cancer research, was appointed a dame by Prince William for her ‘tireless’ labour, and went on excursions such as a trip to Royal Ascot.
Ms. James said that during this time, the family – father Alistair, husband Sebastien, and two children, Hugo, 14, and Eloise, 12 – shared some of their ‘best days’ with Deborah, despite her passing at the end.
She also said that she could not have “coped” without the support for her daughter’s legacy, which includes a clothing line, a second book that will be released in two days, and the encouragement of people to be screened for bowel cancer via the NHS.
She praised the charitable efforts of the host of the BBC podcast You, Me And The Big C on BBC Breakfast, saying, “I still find it incredible that she has the affection of the people.” That meant a great deal. That has meant a great deal to the family and continues to do so.
Deborah is seen in hospital during her dying hours, smiling and extending a thumbs-up as a final goodbye, retaining her optimistic attitude to the end.
Deborah is seen in hospital during her dying hours, smiling and extending a thumbs-up as a final goodbye, retaining her optimistic attitude to the end.
“How could you not admire what she accomplished in only eight weeks? And it did help that others loved her and wanted to assist in every manner possible.
I told her, “I don’t know what I’ll do when you go.” She then left. Life will continue to be enjoyable for you.
And I said, “But I’m not sure whether I can.” She said, “Then you have not done me justice.”
So I believe we all must. Not simply live life, love living life. And live our lives to the fullest. So I believe we owe Deborah for that.’
Deborah was created a dame after announcing she would be receiving hospice care at her parents’ house in Woking. Prime Minister Boris Johnson said, “If ever an honor was fully earned, this is it.”
She later said that she was ‘honored and astonished’ to be nominated for the award. The Duke of Cambridge then personally bestowed the bowel cancer activist in May during a surprise visit to her parents’ home.
Ms. James stated of William, “When he walked in, he immediately put us at ease.” Indeed, it was remarkable. And, exactly like one of my son-in-laws, he joined us at the table. He was so charming that I believe he is a king of the people. Heathe, who remained at her daughter’s side throughout her battle with colon cancer and stood in for Dame Deborah at engagements when she was too unwell to attend, said, ‘I believe the toughest part was knowing she was going to die.
‘It broke my heart as a mother to realize I could do nothing about it, and I believe it was the most difficult thing for me to bear.
‘Knowing that she was becoming physically weaker but intellectually stronger, I was unable to assist her.
“We had some enjoyable moments. I recall laying in bed perhaps a week or so before her passing. And she felt extremely ill that evening.
‘And she said, ‘I do love you,’ and I said, ‘I love you,’ and she said, ‘You know, I have no regrets.
“How many individuals can say that? But she did say, ‘I don’t want to die,’ which is the most difficult and tragic aspect. In 2021, between May and July, a record-breaking 30,000 more individuals sought referrals as a result of the remarkable Bowel Babe activist, whose podcast detailing her experiences with the condition inspired a country.
According to the NHS, between May and July, 170,500 persons were referred for screening for suspected lower gastro-intestinal malignancies, which is approximately 80,000 more than during the same time period two years earlier.
In addition, referrals for colon cancer reached an all-time high in the second week of July, immediately following Dame Deborah’s passing, with a 60% increase above pre-pandemic levels.
In the previous three months, over 200,000 additional people used the NHS website to check for sickness signs. Prior to her death on June 28, she had raised awareness about the cancer.
Genevieve Edwards, chief executive officer of Bowel Cancer UK, said today on BBC Breakfast, “From the time Deborah was diagnosed until the end of her life, she relentlessly campaigned.”
“She was a tremendous campaigner, and you can see the effect she had by the number of individuals that came forward.
The bulk of the thousands of individuals who have come forward undoubtedly do not have colon cancer, but for those who do, this is lifesaving.
“Because Deborah done so, I’ve talked with so many others with bowel cancer who now have the courage to share their own experience.
‘You know, she communicated and connected so effectively that they felt they were able to depart.
Therefore, it is the little talks, like ripples in a pond, that will continue, and this is crucial since bowel cancer is difficult to discuss.
Ms. James remarked of her daughter’s children, “They’ve been wonderful.” I believe Deborah taught them to appreciate life.
And despite the fact that they miss her, they really miss her. They are experiencing it because their mother desired it. The legacy she’s left behind will also be remarkable, and it’s something our family is proud of.’
In her devastating farewell letter, Deborah advised her children to “take risks and experience life now” and to marry for love.
Take a gamble and have faith in yourself. Remember to be your number one cheerleader,’ she said in a paragraph from her upcoming book, How To Live When You Could Be Dead, sighted by The Sun on August 18.
“Don’t put off seeing the world and all it has to offer till retirement; do it now.”
Earlier this month, her husband Sebastien Bowen spoke about the challenges of the final few months he spent with the former assistant principal he married in France in 2008.
Mr. Bowen told the Times, “She was seizing every single opportunity.” However, it was her. This is how I will always remember Deborah: her willingness to enjoy life even in the worst of circumstances.
She enjoyed life more than anybody I know, especially when it got so brief and every minute mattered.
He said, ‘She was so frail that she couldn’t accomplish anything on her own, which frustrated her since she was by nature fiercely independent.
‘At the end, she was paralyzed from the waist down and had to cope with the psychological struggle of her new disability. She was unable to even access the kitchen, much alone clean or clothe herself.
I will not pretend it was simple. It was a new experience for us all, and we all had to find our footing, but it also drew us closer to her and to one another.’