When a Texas cancer survivor who had three miscarriages learned that her desired pregnancy was unviable, she was prohibited from having the abortion in her home state.
In February, a 16-week ultrasound for Kailee DeSpain, 28, and her husband discovered their son Finley had a fatal illness called triploidy, necessitating a 10-hour trip to New Mexico.
DeSpain would have faced possibly deadly problems had she carried the baby to full term, but Texas’s so-called heartbeat abortion bill outlaws practically all abortions save from those that are hazily characterized as “medical emergencies.”
DeSpain set off on a long journey to a neighboring state after being informed that her case did not meet those requirements. When she finally arrived at the abortion facility, pro-life protestors denounced her as a murderer.
After her 16-week scan revealed her baby, Finley, would not survive owing to multiple major health issues, her physicians had encouraged her to seek an abortion.
The news upset the couple, but they decided to terminate the pregnancy in an effort to avoid complications that may have been fatal.
DeSpain says she will “not know a single day of peace until I can manage my own body, and everything that goes on inside of it, in the state I once loved” as she continues to share her tale and advocate for women’s rights.
Before learning she was carrying Finley, DeSpain had three failed pregnancies and battled cervical cancer.
She and her husband remained cautious after finding she was expecting for the fourth time because of past grief and issues.
Although there was initially some worry about her HCG hormone levels, the pregnancy seemed to be moving smoothly.
DeSpain posted on Facebook, “Everything was excellent, normal, and healthy.” “I discovered that he was a boy. God, please. Allow me to bring my boy home safely.
‘Because we were at such a high risk, I had undergone so many ultrasounds. I was most anticipating this one. I had taken Finley further than any of the others, so I finally had hope. My little fighter.
She and her husband discovered Finley had a rare disease called triploidy sixteen weeks into their pregnancy. He also lacked a kidney, a heart with no valves, and a brain that was not fully formed.
She writes: “I had been taken off the blood thinners that were protecting my body from an autoimmune response.” She also claims to have had high blood pressure.
My husband was looking at me with fear in his eyes and saying that he would NOT lose me, too. There was now a greater chance that I might not survive.
According to her doctors, if the pregnancy went on, she would probably experience dangerous complications and Finley wouldn’t survive.
According to the National Library of Medicine, pre-eclampsia in the second trimester can be brought on by carrying a triploid child. High blood pressure and elevated HCG levels are two symptoms of the condition that frequently manifest.
The care team for DeSpain advised her to get an abortion even though they were unable to perform it due to Texas law.
‘They explained that I didn’t have any options in Texas, but that this was very serious,’ she wrote.
She and her husband drove 10 hours to a clinic in New Mexico were DeSpain received an abortion, but not before being met with hateful commentary.
‘I walked into the clinic alone.’ I passed people whose signs said that I was a murderer,’ DeSpain said.
They yelled at me, “Don’t harm your baby!” ‘We have the means!’
My infant is triploid. He is dying now. I retorted, “He is going to SUFFOCATE!” I was enraged. I was aware that I was facing the most difficult decision of all and that those folks would never give it a second thought.
She remarked that the pro-life protesters “didn’t even ask” before assuming that she didn’t want the child that she and her husband had worked so hard to conceive.
They believed that DeSpain did not want the child for whom she had prayed for over eight years, she stated. I was aware that individuals like that are unwilling to comprehend. Such folks will never have compassion for people like myself.
Finley’s ashes were then sent back to Texas via mail following the procedure.
After a draft SCOTUS opinion indicating the high court’s intention to reverse the seminal 1973 ruling Roe v. Wade, which determined that abortion fell under the constitutional right to privacy, was leaked, DeSpain first shared her story back in May.
She specifically singled out in her post those who had criticized her for wanting an abortion and those who support making abortion illegal.
She wrote, “No one should have to share a story like mine to defend abortion.”
I shouldn’t have to expose myself to your judgment in order for you to determine whether I am one of the select few women you believe should have been “allowed” to have an abortion.
For you to determine whether I fall into one of the select groups that you have determined to be legal justifications for abortion. I’ll let you determine whether I’m a murderer or not.
“I made my decision because it was best for my baby, my body, and my family,” the woman said. You don’t have the right to judge my decision or gleefully take away my rights.
“Your opinion stopped being okay when it started limiting my ability to make safe decisions for myself,” she continued.
“Your opinion ceased to be acceptable when it backed those in positions of authority who denied my doctors in Texas the ability to treat me,”
DeSpain said, “No one owes you their story.” But I’ve given you mine in the hopes that it will help you see the damage that people have caused by backing politicians who think that states have the right to outlaw abortion.
“Abortion shouldn’t have ever been made political, but it was. I can only ask that you vote with other women like me in mind.
After Roe v. Wade was officially overruled by the Supreme Court on June 24, specific “trigger laws” and historic bans that were immediately reinstated as a result of the decision increased the popularity of her post.
A trigger law that would outlaw abortion in Texas, where DeSpain resides, is due to take effect in less than two months.
There are only two situations in which the so-called trigger restriction on abortions at any stage of pregnancy is lifted: saving the mother’s life or preventing “severe impairment of major physiological function.”
The law also renders performing an abortion a felony violation.
Nobody who aids a woman in getting an abortion would be prosecuted, but doctors who execute the procedure might be sentenced to life in jail or a fine of up to $100,000.
In a post on July 3, DeSpain said, “People have asked me why I continue to share — why I don’t desire peace for myself to heal after losing our kid.”
My response is that unless I am able to control my own body and everything that occurs inside of it in the manner I once liked, I will not experience even a single day of serenity.
The sense of security that I and many other people enjoyed in this state was taken away by Texas lawmakers. I won’t allow anyone to forget it.
I won’t stop talking about it, NO. NO, I won’t stop speaking the truth simply because it hurts you to hear that these lawmakers are out of control.