Trans and adoptive parents breastfeed without giving birth: ‘I made like a mom’

Trans and adoptive parents breastfeed without giving birth: ‘I made like a mom’


Jackie Kent will never forget the first time that her baby Everett latched onto her breast.

Kent’s uterus was discovered to have a congenital problem following unsuccessful intrauterine-insemination treatments. Kent had always desired to give birth and breastfeed a child, but she was unable to do so due to a uterine malformation. Kent, 35, and her wife Megan were told that Kent could never carry a child.

The couple, who reside in Chico, California, agreed to reverse roles, with Kent providing the eggs and Megan carrying the baby. Kent accepted that her dream of breastfeeding was over.

However, after a friend adopted a child, the couple learned about induced lactation, a regimen of medication and pumping designed to “fool” the body into believing it is pregnant and stimulate milk production. Kent was aware that she desired the item.

Kent was present on the day Megan gave birth to Everett to breastfeed him. Later, she and Megan breastfed their second child, Sutton, for her first six weeks of life.

“Breastfeeding felt so normal and natural, and it felt like I could finally step into the role of motherhood as I had envisioned,” Kent told Insider. I felt as like my body had failed me during pregnancy, and this offered me a fresh perspective on my body.

Jackie Kent breastfeeding her daughter Sutton.

Jackie Kent/courtesy of Meagan Heller

Induced lactation can provide the same advantages as breastfeeding.

In recent decades, social developments have redefined what it means to become a parent. Lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender couples are now able to follow their goals of creating a family, while adoption and surrogacy remain viable options for many parents.

In recent years, Dr. Sharon Silberstein, an OB-GYN and lactation consultant in London, has observed an increase in the desire for assistance with forced lactation.

“Induced lactation is becoming more generally known because to social media,” Silberstein added. “More people now have access to assistance via remote help, and more material has been written on the subject, so I feel it is becoming more prevalent.”

Silberstein stated that many parents who couldn’t or hadn’t given birth were looking for ways to provide their children with the health benefits of breastfeeding, such as fewer infections and a reduced risk of sudden infant death syndrome, and to bond with them.

Silberstein stated, “inducing lactation can be advantageous in a variety of scenarios.” It facilitates attachment and provides the similar nutritional benefits as nursing after pregnancy.

Kent and Megan, along with their children Everett and Sutton.

Jackie Kent/courtesy of Meagan Heller

Silberstein stated that most parents adhere to the Newman-Goldfarb protocols, which were developed in Canada in 2000 by Dr. Jack Newman and Lenore Goldfarb. Goldfarb stated in a 2011 interview that 31% of women who used the procedures produced a full milk supply; while the method is acceptable within the medical community, it remains understudied.

Six months before to delivery, parents are recommended to take a combined birth control pill containing progesterone and estrogen, as well as domperidone, an anti-nausea medicine that has the side effect of promoting breast enlargement.

The birth control suppresses a mother’s milk supply until six weeks prior to delivery. The parent subsequently stops taking the contraceptive but continues to take domperidone. This promotes a quick decline in serum progesterone levels and an increase in serum prolactin levels, simulating the chemical events that occur after childbirth and the production of breast milk.

This is followed by the addition of blessed thistle and fenugreek seed, plants believed to stimulate milk production. Although the two have been used as folk medicines for generations, very little study has been conducted on their efficacy.

A rigorous pumping schedule commences to increase the supply. Parents are recommended to breastfeed their infants every three hours for five to seven minutes, including during the night.

Both pumping and medication must continue after the infant begins breastfeeding. This stimulates milk production and keeps the supply from running out.

Lactation induction can alleviate the trauma of infertility.

Numerous parents who stimulate lactation have previously dealt with infertility. Some individuals who have established their families through adoption or surrogacy report feeling more connected to the physical aspect of childbirth.

Chrissy Fleishman, 36, from Maryland has Mayer-Rokitansky-Küster-Hauser syndrome, which means she was born without a cervix or uterus and cannot bear children. Instead, she has two children via surrogacy: Bram, born in 2015, and Wilder, born in January. She has successfully stimulated lactation in both cases.

Insider was told by Fleishman that infertility is traumatic and accompanied by a grief process. “There is a loss of what you imagined your life would look like, and a sense that your body is broken and unable to perform what it was’meant’ to do.”

She continued, “I felt that by inducing lactation, if I couldn’t grow him in my body, at least I could help him grow once he was out and with me.” Even with its obstacles, it was immensely therapeutic.

Chrissy Fleishman, who was born without a uterus, induced lactation in order to breastfeed her son Bram.

Thanks to Chrissy Fleishman

Bekki Hockman, 48, of Suffolk, Virginia, attempted to conceive for 25 years prior to turning to surrogacy, with her goddaughter willing to carry her child. Mia, Hockman’s daughter, turned three in May, and she is currently breastfeeding her via artificial lactation.

Hockman stated, “I had always intended to breastfeed my children; obviously, I never anticipated infertility troubles.” Having a surrogate made it even more vital for me to establish a strong bond with my daughter, and nursing helped me feel more like a mother.

Induced lactation can assist transgender parents in confirming their gender identification.

Induced lactation is also popular among transgender parents, including those who have transitioned from female to male and vice versa. Silberstein stated that she recently dealt with a transgender lady whose pregnant wife was her partner. Using the Newman-Goldfarb regimen, the woman has produced some breast milk.

Christina Avery, age 40, was the mother of two teenagers when she fell in love with her future husband, Radford Cowan. Cowan told to Avery one year into their relationship that he intended to transition from female to male but still desired to have biological children. In April, he gave birth to their first child, Wilder.

As part of his transition, Cowan had his breast tissue removed, so he is unable to breastfeed. Instead, Avery chose to attempt to stimulate lactation.

Avery stated, “Having breastfed my first two children far into their toddler years, I was aware of the health and attachment benefits.” It felt like a good way to divide up the parental responsibilities, and my partner was my biggest booster.

Unfortunately, Wilder had a tongue-tie and spent time in the hospital with jaundice, which affected Avery’s milk supply. She continues to breastfeed many times daily, but must supplement with donor milk from a bottle.

“I continue to support induced lactation,” she stated. It has been wonderful to be able to feed my child and provide them with some of the benefits of breastfeeding, as well as to continue to bond with them in this manner.

Inducing lactation presents obstacles.

Inducing lactation is a difficult process, especially for patients in the United States. The required medicine, domperidone, is not approved for usage in the United States since it can cause cardiac side effects. 2004 was the year when the Food and Drug Administration issued a warning regarding the drug. It is accessible in the United Kingdom and Canada, although with limitations.

“There is a slight elevated risk of cardiac adverse effects,” noted Silberstein of the United Kingdom. “When inducing lactation, we guarantee that the patient has no heart problems and closely monitor them while administering a low dose of the medicine,” the sentence continues.

In the United States, parents who wish to take domperidone cannot obtain a prescription; the only option is to import medication from overseas in accordance with FDA regulations.

“Obtaining domperidone in the United States is difficult,” Fleishman stated. “I had to purchase from a foreign pharmacy, which is expensive and time-consuming.”

Even if they have access to medicine, parents attempting to induce lactation must create a time-consuming pumping regimen that might leave them weary before the birth of their child.

“Pumping was unquestionably one of the greatest obstacles,” Kent added. “It is absolutely consuming, and after the baby is delivered, it is difficult to determine how often to nurse and how often to pump to maintain supply. There were days when it was the only thing I could think about.”

Those who induce lactation typically produce less milk than those who have carried a child. Hockman discovered after the birth of Mia that she had insufficient glandular tissue, a condition in which the breast’s milk-producing tissue does not develop as expected. She was only able to make a limited amount of milk.

“The most difficult aspect was knowing I could not earn any more,” Hockman added. “I only made 5.6 ounces per day, and that’s being nice; we supplemented for two years with donor milk.”

Bekki Hockman began breastfeeding her baby Mia as soon as she was born. Her goddaughter acted as a gestational carrier.

Thanks to Bekka Hockman

Hockman and other parents who have induced lactation say they would not change a thing despite the difficulties.

Hockman remarked, “I’d do it a hundred times over.” This is one of the greatest things I have ever accomplished.


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